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What’s Narcissistic Supply?

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Narcissistic supply is the attention that people with narcissistic personality disorder crave to feel good about themselves. They seek validation, love, admiration, and even negative attention. The attention received is called their narcissistic supply, and they will go to great lengths to elicit reactions from others. They thrive on attention, whether positive or negative, and will present themselves as more talented, knowledgeable, witty, wealthy, intelligent, or important than they actually are.

Narcissistic supply is a term psychologists often use to refer to the advice that people with narcissistic personality disorder typically crave. People who suffer from narcissism generally lack an inherent sense of self-worth, and therefore rely on the attention of others to feel good about themselves. Many experts liken the narcissist’s need to be noticed by others to a form of addiction. Many people suffering from narcissism prefer their narcissistic offering to come from positive forms of notice, such as validation, love, or admiration, although negative forms of notice can also form such a person’s narcissistic offering. Experts typically identify two main types of narcissistic offering: primary, which generally constitutes more audience-oriented forms of communication, and secondary, which usually constitutes communication acquired in the course of interpersonal relationships.

The notice a narcissist is able to receive, whether publicly in the form of infamy or fame, or privately in the context of an interpersonal relationship, is said to constitute his or her narcissistic supply. The narcissist will generally go to great lengths to elicit reactions from others. The narcissist will generally seek out a person or group capable and willing to provide him with a high level of attention. Psychologists usually refer to this group or person as a narcissistic supply source.

Once the narcissist has found someone who can provide them with large amounts of attention, they will generally attempt to call that attention back to themselves in some way. While most people like to get a certain amount of notice from others, the typical narcissist will seek out all the notice they can get. Unlike a person with a healthy personality, the narcissist is believed to thrive just as well on condemnation, hate, fear, anger, and confrontation as they do on more positive forms of attention. Those with healthy personalities, on the other hand, usually prefer to receive only positive attention. Also, those with healthy personalities usually start to feel a little uneasy if they start getting excessive amounts of approval.

The more others notice and pay attention to, experts believe, the better the narcissist feels about themselves. Usually it doesn’t matter if he gets praise or condemnation, as long as he gets noticed. The narcissistic person will usually attempt to get the attention of others by presenting themselves as much more talented, knowledgeable, witty, wealthy, intelligent, or important than they actually are.

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