Abandonment issues can arise from childhood neglect or abuse, causing fear of rejection and dysfunctional behaviors in adulthood. Psychological therapy can help overcome these issues. Symptoms include scrutinizing relationships for signs of abandonment, excessive clinginess, and self-harm threats. Therapy can provide tools for emotional independence.
People who fear abandonment often worry excessively that those they care about, even their closest loved ones, may one day leave them. These problems are common in those who were abandoned as children or whose childhood caregivers were emotionally unavailable. While many people may experience some level of fear of relationship loss due to life-or-death changes, people with abandonment issues often develop a variety of dysfunctional behaviors. These behaviors often only serve to alienate that person’s friends and loved ones even more, so that fear can sometimes become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Psychological therapy can often help those who fear abandonment overcome their issues and ultimately feel more secure in relationships.
Fear of abandonment can start in childhood when a parent or other caregiver literally abandons the child. Childhood neglect and abuse can also cause abandonment issues later in life, as abused and neglected children often struggle with feelings of loneliness and helplessness. Some people with such problems may never have been abandoned, abused or neglected as a child, but may fear being left behind due to emotional problems of various kinds, including personality disorders.
The true fear of abandonment often doesn’t manifest itself until adulthood, when the person is first faced with living independently. When the fear sets in, it can leave its victims terrified of being completely rejected by friends and loved ones. Those with abandonment issues often feel confident that all of their intimate relationships are on the verge of dissolution and that they themselves will be powerless to continue on their own.
Those suffering from genuine abandonment issues often exhibit a specific set of psychological symptoms. They often scrutinize their relationships for signs that abandonment is imminent. These individuals may panic over even the slightest perceived or actual flaws in a loved one’s behavior, such as not returning a phone call or being a few minutes late for an appointment. They often cling excessively to the person or relationship they fear losing and may go to great lengths to please their loved ones in an effort to prove that they are worth it and shouldn’t be rejected. They may threaten to self-harm if their loved one leaves. A person who fears being abandoned by a romantic partner may jump from one brief relationship to another in an attempt to avoid being abandoned by leaving alone.
Symptoms of abandonment issues can often make it difficult for those experiencing them to form strong relationships. Many behaviors only serve to push loved ones away, rather than keep them close. Therapy can help those suffering from fear of abandonment understand the causes of their problems and can provide them with the tools they need to overcome these emotional problems and achieve emotional independence.
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