The term “queer” has a complex history and meaning, with some finding it offensive and others reclaiming it as self-identification. Its appropriateness depends on context and intent, and individuals should be aware of how they use language to avoid causing offense.
The question of whether or not the term “queer” is derogatory has a complex answer, in part because the definition of the word is so malleable. Some people find using this word to describe someone extremely offensive and have very legitimate reasons to feel that way. Others have chosen to reclaim “queer,” using it as self-identification, and advocate its use in a positive way. Ultimately, the decision to use or avoid using this word is up to you, but you may want to think carefully about how and when you use it.
Before we delve into the murky waters surrounding the use of this word, it can be helpful to know how it is used. In a literal sense, “queer” means “unusual.” In the late 19th century, the term came to be used to describe members of the gay community, and was used very derogatorily. However, in the 1919s, some members of the gay community decided to reclaim “queer,” just as other minority groups reclaimed words that have historically been used in a derogatory way. At this point, the meanings of the word began to diverge, as did the places where its use was appropriate.
“Queer” can be used to talk about someone within the homosexual community, but it is also used as a generic term to describe people with other sexual practices, such as asexuals, along with transgender people, BDSM practitioners, and other people who engage in outside the social norm. In this sense, “queer” could be considered an antonym of heteronormativity, a word that is sometimes used to discuss traditional heterosexual relationships. The use of this word as a convenient shorthand to describe people with non-heteronormative practices is very common, because other words to describe this large and diverse community are very clumsy.
Some people think the term is only appropriately used by people who identify as queer. For example, a gay man who identifies as queer might refer to himself and others in this way, but a heterosexual man might not, even if he considers himself gay-friendly. Others find that the use of the term is also appropriate among people who identify as “queer allies,” meaning that while they don’t personally identify as queer, they do support this community.
Like many words with a charged story, the appropriateness of this word depends on the context and intent of the speaker. When people use “queer” as an insult, it’s really derogatory and hurtful, even when it’s used to insult people who normally happily identify with the word. However, increasing examples of positive use of this word can be found; many popular TV shows, for example, use “queer” in their titles and college associations for people who identify as gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender/asexual/etc. they often use the term in their names to be as inclusive as possible.
If you decide not to use this term because you find it personally offensive, no one will blame you for it. In fact, people who identify as queer would much rather see people refrain from using the word out of uncertainty than see people use it as an insult. However, you may want to be prepared to see people using it as a positive term, and some people may specifically request that you refer to them in this way.
As always, being aware of the language you and others use is never a bad thing. By not being afraid to speak up when you hear someone use a term in a way you find offensive, you may be able to spark a conversation that could be mutually educational. In addition to thinking about how words like “queer” and “gay” are being used around you, you might also be thinking about clever words like “lame” or “retarded” or sexist terms like “whore.”
Protect your devices with Threat Protection by NordVPN
