To effectively deal with conflicts, one must develop conflict resolution skills, including active listening, remaining calm, recognizing differing opinions, promoting compromises, recognizing root causes, and letting go of punishment. These skills lead to peaceful resolution.
Conflicts happen in interpersonal relationships as well as in workplace relationships; this is a normal part of life and should not necessarily be avoided. However, to deal with them effectively, you need to develop conflict resolution skills, the most important of which is the ability to listen well. One must not only be able to listen well, but also listen actively; this means taking notes, asking clarifying questions, and summarizing to ensure an understanding is achieved. Active listening ranks first on the list of conflict resolution skills a person must possess to diffuse conflict and come to constructive conclusions.
It’s easy to lose your temper during an argument or conflict, but another of the most important conflict resolution skills is the ability to remain calm. This will help diffuse any hostility between people in conflict and will also help everyone better understand the causes of conflict. It’s all too easy to let problems pile up and store up arguments for the great controversy; this should be avoided as it often takes the conflict to a personal level that can be harmful to one or more parties involved.
Conflict resolution skills will help you better understand each side of the argument. It is important to recognize differing opinions and recognize them as valid concerns. This ensures that all parties involved feel validated and respected. From there, it is necessary to learn to discuss possible positive results and promote compromises; no conflict can be fully resolved without concessions on each side of the argument; therefore, it is important to lead each side on the path to understanding, making them recognize that compromises must be made.
Recognizing the root cause of a conflict is often more important than resolving the apparent problem. Conflict resolution skills include the ability to recognize when an argument stems from a deeper issue, as it often does. Asking clarifying questions can help find the root cause; simple questions like “When did this all start?” and “Was your anger caused by something else?” it can help everyone involved better understand how to arrive at a reasonable solution to problems.
Sometimes the most useful of conflict resolution skills is the hardest to put into practice: letting go of the idea of punishment. When someone feels wronged, he naturally feels that the criminal must be punished. In many situations, a conflict can be resolved more quickly and easily if all parties are willing to forget about punishment and work toward a constructive outcome. This is a difficult concept for many people, especially those who are angry and frustrated. When dealing with conflict, developing the ability to forgive and forget will go a long way toward peaceful resolution.
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