“Deadbeat dad” is a slang term used in the US and Canada to describe a father who does not pay child support. It has negative connotations and is often used in general conversation and by government agencies. The father’s intent to pay is important in applying the term correctly. Some reasons for not paying include disagreement with the amount owed or feeling overwhelmed by the debt. Efforts towards child support enforcement include suspending driving privileges and withholding wages. The term has roots in the American Civil War.
“Deadbeat dad” is the gender-specific slang term used primarily in the United States and Canada to describe a father who willfully evades a court order to provide financial support for his children. Used in general conversation and by government agencies, the phrase has origins in the American Civil War and has negative connotations based on social contexts. The father’s intent to pay is important in the application of etiquette, for some men want to pay but, for one legitimate reason or another, cannot. Some people criticize not only the term but also the methods used to get individuals to meet their debt.
Common use
In general, “dead dad” is a slang term used in everyday conversation. While other descriptions are available, many child support agencies and courts also use the phrase loosely, simply because most people understand what is meant when someone says or writes it. The line between common and legal terminology is not particularly clear for this reason.
Related connotations
In most of North America, people generally expect parents to take responsibility for their children, even if the parents are not married or living together. Although society is becoming more tolerant of single parents and making progress towards better gender equality, the trend is still for women to be the primary caregivers for children and most people look particularly hard on men who they do not provide help to their children and former partners. Given this social context, when someone uses this phrase, the additional connotations are that the father is largely irresponsible in all aspects, does not value family, is (and perhaps never will be) a productive member of the community, and is self-absorbed. . These associations aren’t necessarily true in every case and can be hard for a man to shake, even if he eventually pays off his debt.
Role of intent in labeling
Not all men earn enough of the “dead dad” label. Some fathers really want to pay, but for legitimate reasons, such as unexpected medical bills or business layoffs, fall behind in delivering the money they owe. In the emotionally charged context of separation and divorce, the failure of these men to comply with the support order can lead ex-partners to see and portray them to others as the “bad boys.”
Real deadbeat dads usually don’t have any kind of emotional remorse or resolution for their lack of payment, and they tend to keep excuses for their behavior. Many go to extremes to avoid child support order enforcement, such as remarrying, changing their names, and working for money. The intent of the father, rather than mere lack of conformity, is essential to applying the term correctly.
Reasons not to pay
Mortified dads often voice a few common reasons for not complying with a child support order. One is that, even though they may love their children, they believe that mothers aren’t really going to use the money for its intended purpose. Some fathers believe that their ex-partners somehow deceived them and that women got pregnant on purpose just to keep them in relationships. Others think that mothers had children believing that, with child support, they would be able to get out of work. The theme is the general feeling that mothers are taking advantage of it.
In some cases, men refuse to pay child support because they disagree with the amount they have been ordered to pay. Sometimes they are unaware that they can typically report changes in their financial and general circumstances to the court to get the amount they are required to provide reduced. Other fathers feel so overwhelmed by the amount they owe that they see no point in trying to eliminate debt.
Efforts toward child support order enforcement
In the United States, California’s 1992 precedent requiring companies with five or more employees to report names and Social Security numbers of all new hires was the first major step toward effective child support enforcement ever made in state level. In 1996, the United States Congress made California’s program national, requiring all states to create systems with the same standards. Child support enforcement agencies in the United States also work together in a no tolerance, no immunity program to catch child support offenders of all ranks. Slacker dads can no longer cross state lines in hopes of hiding out, and federal databases also help find the serious culprits. Most states use tactics such as suspending driving privileges, withholding passports, withholding state tax refunds, withholding wages, limiting or denying unemployment benefits, and making contempt of court arrests to encourage men to pay up.
Online resources
Today, many jurisdictions provide formal lists of the most wanted deadbeat dads. These resources, aside from their use of the term “deadbeat,” remain fairly neutral, usually listing only the offender’s name, photo, date of birth, and amount owed. Websites outside government agencies are common and have had some degree of success in finding men who owe money, but many are not objective. They often contain forums or comment threads where users post personal attacks against the people listed, as well as against each other. Individuals who want to use these sites, therefore, need to use a degree of caution, because it is often difficult to determine how much of what is said is actually true.
Effect on the visit
Women who do not receive child support are often hurt and angry about their situation. Sometimes they take revenge against fathers who fail to pay child support by refusing to let them see their children. In general, legal professionals in the United States do not advise mothers to do so, because a father’s slacker status is in no way tied to the visitation decision. Regardless of how much the father owes, he still has the right to attend visits that are legally permitted. Mothers who refuse visitation may find themselves in legal trouble for not following court orders.
While fathers who don’t pay support may legally have the right to see their children, many do not. They often know that showing up for a visit puts them at risk of arrest, so they often choose to “keep it low” on purpose. Failure to attend visits typically becomes another source of conflict in the relationship between mother and father.
Deadbeat mother
Statistically, in the United States, only one in five custody cases result in fathers having custody of the children. Therefore, a man is more likely to have to support children than a woman. As the social landscape changes, however, more and more fathers seek and obtain custody, and the number of mothers who are nerds is growing. A 2011 report from the US Census Bureau showed that even though fathers who don’t pay still outnumber moms who don’t, mothers are less likely to pay everything they owe: 42 percent of mothers received everything they should have received, but only 34.1% of fathers did. This may in part be because women often have lower incomes than men, even when their jobs, education and experience are roughly the same.
criticisms
Some people are against the use of the term “dead dad.” These individuals point out that the phrase is often thrown around before all the facts are proven, sometimes leading to unfair discrimination. Related to this idea is the fact that stereotyping can occur: despite the fact that men of all backgrounds and races can be slackers, the tendency is to associate the term with the African-American community based on statistical data, even if such information does not necessarily explain the economic and social disadvantages that may be present for this group. They also argue that some of the ways government agencies try to make men pay are not effective. Putting a father in jail, for example, not only prevents him from working so he can pay off debt, but it can also prevent him from attending visitation sessions, which can have negative effects on the child.
Origin of the sentence
Although people usually think of “dead dad” as a modern term, it actually has roots in the 19th century, specifically the Civil War era. During this time, the word “beat” could refer to cheating. It also referred to work or activity, such as “pace walking.” When a soldier intentionally shirked his military duties, superiors called him “dead insane” because he wasn’t participating in the work as he should have and because he deceived his company by putting it out of service. Eventually, people adopted the term for anyone shirking responsibility and started applying it to men who weren’t taking care of their families financially.
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