The Purity Ball is a formal event where fathers pledge to protect their daughters’ purity by being good fathers, moral people, and excellent husbands. It is not about daughters pledging virginity to their fathers, but rather about the importance of fathers in raising daughters. The evening involves dancing, dinner, and the fathers’ Purity Pledge. The event has spread from the US to several European countries.
The Purity Ball is a concept developed by Randy Wilson and his wife Rita, and the first ball was held in 1998. It would be a mistake to describe the ball as a typical father-daughter dance, even though that takes up some of the night’s activity. Instead it is also a night in which fathers pledge to be pure and to protect the purity of their daughter by acting as good fathers, moral people and excellent husbands. This commitment is often Christian-based, and the concept of the Purity Dance has launched in numerous copies, especially in evangelical Christian communities.
There is often a misconception that a purity dance constitutes a commitment by the daughter to remain pure, or in other words, to remain a virgin, until marriage. In fact, many girls who attend the dance believe this is part of the promise, but Wilson and his wife say the intention was not part of the original plan. Instead, both argue, as in a 2007 episode of The Tyra Banks Show, that Purity Balls acknowledges the extreme importance of fathers in raising daughters. They argue that most girls who become lost in their teens or promiscuous do so because of abandonment or a broken relationship with a father. Instead of girls pledging purity at these events, dads pledge to be faithful to their daughters and help protect and guide them through their teens and into marriage.
While the event may be pure in intent, it regularly inspires quite a negative reaction in the press. Some call the idea of fathers committing to their daughters as akin to incest, especially when fathers also engage in regular “dates” with their daughters or consider themselves as taking the place of a lover until a girl is married or engaged. Others are concerned about daughters who think the dance represents that they are pledging their virginity to their fathers. Wilson insists that’s not the intent of the Purity Ball, and instead suggests that it’s time for dads to step up and promise their daughters that they’ll be good and kind fathers. By setting an example of being honest and true men, girls hopefully look for these same qualities when choosing husbands.
The typical Purity Ball, at least those orchestrated by the Wilsons, involves an evening of dancing, dinner, and then the fathers’ Purity Pledge. The girls dance with their dads all night long and then place a white rose on a cross as a symbol of this pledge of purity. The evening is very formal and dad, stepfather or adoptive dad participates with all their daughters, from the youngest to the oldest.
For the Wilsons, the Purity Ball is just symbolic of how fathers should interact with their daughters on a daily basis. Fathers should not only pledge purity, but also guardianship of their daughters, a willingness to be involved parents, and the importance of staying pure in their lives by supporting and living moral lifestyles (as defined by Christianity). Many people celebrate these balls as a means for fathers and daughters to establish excellent relationships, and the popularity of the Purity Ball has spread from many locations in the United States to several European countries.
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