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Date rape is when a person is raped by someone they know, ranging from casual acquaintances to intimate partners. It is the most common form of rape, and can be difficult to prove in court. Consent is key, and any refusal of sexual behavior must be respected. Prosecuting date rape can be challenging, as the victim must prove non-consent. To reduce the risk of rape, attend parties with friends, don’t accept drinks from strangers, and avoid excessive alcohol and illegal drugs. Support is available for victims through counseling and hotlines.
Date rape or acquaintance rape refers to the rape of a person by someone the person knows. The rapist’s knowledge in this type of rape can range from casual acquaintance to intimate relationship with the person, including marriage.
Date rape is the most common form of rape. About 28 percent of US rape victims who report the attack are raped by their husbands or boyfriends. The Justice Department estimates that approximately 35% of rapes are raped by an acquaintance. Continuing public education can help reduce these numbers, but ultimately it’s only part of a huge problem. While it is the most common type of rape, it can be more difficult to prove in court, due to the victim’s acquaintance with the rapist and all possible explanations for the crime.
The key to date rape is that you don’t get consent from the raped person. Failure to consent may be verbal or, if the person is unconscious, any tactile or sexual contact with that person is seen as non-consensual. For those who don’t have clear ideas, even the weakest “no” or “stop” represents the lack of consent and must be respected as the person’s desire not to have sexual relations.
One potential problem with prosecuting this crime is that the victim, usually the only witness to the crime, must prove that they have not consented. Dating, dressing provocatively, or flirting can all be seen as mixed signals. However, any person who refuses sex with an acquaintance, partner, girlfriend, or boyfriend is essentially establishing non-consent, even if the person refusing has given mixed signals or has consented to sexual intercourse in the past. Whenever a prospective sexual partner requests that the sexual behavior stop, it must cease or it is an illegal and criminal act.
Another major challenge to adequately prosecuting date rape is that the person raped may not have a complete recollection of the events that occurred. This may be the case, for example, at parties where a woman, or a man, has drunk too much alcohol. In other cases, some rapists now specifically disable their victims by inserting different forms of illegal drugs into their drinks, alcoholic or otherwise. Drugs like rohypnol, ketamine, or gamma-hydroxybutyric acid (GHB) can cause acquiescence or unconsciousness, making it easy to subdue a non-consenting person to intercourse.
To address this crime, which is especially prevalent on college campuses, some colleges now offer in-person contracts that spell out exactly what kind of sexual behavior is welcome and what isn’t. However, since at least half of rapes occur when both parties are under the influence of alcohol, which is freely available on most college campuses, such contracts may not be honored.
Law enforcement experts recommend the following to help reduce rape attempts. Attend parties with friends and never set your drink down where it could be tampered with. Don’t accept a drink from someone you barely know or casually know. Avoid drinking alcohol in excess as it minimizes your ability to defend yourself or recognize a potentially dangerous situation. Avoid using illegal drugs, which can also interfere with the ability to defend oneself. Employ a buddy system to ensure that everyone gets home safely.
If you are a victim of rape, you are not alone. Reporting a rape can be difficult, and participating in the prosecution of a dating rapist is emotionally daunting. Get help from the many support groups for those who have been victims of violence. In recovering from any sexual assault, it is important to get counseling to help cope with misplaced feelings of guilt and shame.
For women who have been raped by a husband or boyfriend, keep in mind that this abuse of you is likely to happen again. If you can, go to a safe place and report the crime. Women who have experienced a history of abuse with a husband or boyfriend are at extreme risk of continued and escalated abuse. Again, you are not alone and you are actually among the majority of rape victims. There is support for all rape victims, which they can find by calling the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE, or by calling 911 to report a rape.
