Empathy involves feeling with a person rather than feeling sorry for them. It is important in therapy and support groups, but one must also maintain some distance. Empathy helps restore perspective to those who have experienced tragedy and can lead to catharsis in literature and film.
Empathy is a different feeling from sympathy. When you are understanding, you imply pity but keep your distance from another person’s feelings. Empathy is more of a sense that one can truly understand or imagine the depth of another person’s feelings. It involves feeling with a person, rather than feeling sorry for a person.
Empathy is a translation of the German term Einfühlung, which means to feel at one with. It involves load sharing, or “walking a mile in someone else’s shoes,” in order to properly understand that person’s perspective.
In therapy, for example, being nice to a patient implies distance and a lack of understanding of the patient’s point of view. On the other hand, the therapist who shows empathy is attempting to deepen his understanding from the patient’s point of view. This implies closeness rather than distance as it makes little distinction between the person suffering and the person trying to understand suffering. However, the therapist must also protect himself from becoming entangled in the client’s emotional state. You also need to maintain some distance when practicing empathy.
Group therapy often works because those with a specific problem, such as alcoholism, are able to show empathy for one another. Every alcoholic person finds it easier to understand others who struggle with alcoholism.
Alternatively, a group dedicated to providing support to people who have lost a child relies on the empathy of the members. Each person has something in common with the other group members. Everyone can deeply understand the monumental importance and tragedy of losing a child in a way that cannot be understood by a person who has not lost a child.
Often people who have suffered a loss or experienced a tragedy find themselves discouraged by sympathy. Sympathy often emphasizes that the bereaved is alone. Even if kindly understood, sympathy is often rejected. Grievers don’t necessarily want pity, but instead want understanding. Finding friends who can offer empathy helps restore perspective to a world that has been torn apart by tragedy. Emphasize that you are not alone and share your intense feelings with other people.
For those who truly want to help a grieving person, empathy isn’t always possible. Most people can’t even begin to be “as one with” a person who has been raped, abused, or experienced the death of a loved one. However, in trying to express empathy, one must think carefully. “What would it really be like?” Sometimes the only appropriate response is to tell a person, “I can only imagine how hard that must be for you.” In this way, we get closer to empathy.
In literature, catharsis for the reader is often achieved through empathy with a character. Indeed, literature and other artistic mediums such as film can often help psychologically. When a character is drawn well and the thoughts or experiences of the character are related to, the resolutions made by the character can point the reader or viewer into new ways of thinking about their situations. In this way the empathy of the reader or viewer can cause catharsis.
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