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Rejection sensitivity is a psychological condition where individuals are hypersensitive to rejection, often sensing it where it doesn’t exist. It can lead to overreactions and violent behavior, affecting relationships with peers and colleagues. Treatment involves talk therapy to process perceptions of rejection and unworthiness.
Rejection sensitivity is a psychological condition characterized by hypersensitivity to rejection. It typically appears in people with various neurotic conditions such as borderline personality disorder and can be extremely debilitating for people who suffer from it. Treatment typically complements treatment for the underlying neurotic condition with talk therapy to discuss and process perceptions of rejection and unworthiness.
Someone with this condition tends to be extremely sensitive to rejection, often sensing it where it doesn’t exist. For example, after hearing that a group of friends went out without her, a woman with rejection sensitivity might think that her friends didn’t like her, when they don’t. Her perception of her rejection, however, may lead her to be angry or aggressive, putting stress on her relationship with her friends.
Individuals suffering from this problem also suffer from an abnormal amount of dread in situations where rejection is a possibility. They may be extremely distressed at the thought of asking someone out on a date, for example, or at the thought of meeting new people. This anticipation can set up a self-fulfilling prophecy, where the person behaves strangely out of fear, thus creating a situation where she is rejected, confirming previous fears.
In the event of an actual rejection, people with rejection sensitivity tend to overreact, sometimes quite violently. In addition to being unpleasant for everyone involved, this overreaction can also work to create a self-fulfilling prophecy in which rejection will be experienced over and over again as members of the person’s social group learn that they are unstable.
While many people might think of rejection specifically in the sense of romantic rejection, rejection sensitivity can also affect people when they interact with peers, colleagues, and others. It’s also not limited to people in powerless positions; it’s as likely to strike a shy 16-year-old girl as a 50-year-old professor is. Often people are unaware of how severely this condition affects their lives until they start receiving treatment for it, causing their perception of the world to change dramatically.
When dealing with someone who has this problem, it can be helpful to remember that seemingly harmless actions can be perceived as offending. Sometimes it’s helpful to point out that something isn’t a rejection if one person senses that someone else seems upset by it. People who are close to someone with the condition may want to encourage them to seek therapy.
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