Falling in love is not a universal expression and can be difficult to define. It involves heightened romantic interest and a sense of helplessness. It can cause physiological reactions but is not solely chemical. Maintaining a relationship after the initial rush can be difficult, so it’s important to take time to get to know someone.
Falling in love may be a common expression in much of the Western world, but it’s not used much elsewhere. The phrase may be related to the idea of ”falling head over heels,” which was used in the 1300s, and is another term for suddenly being struck by a strong romantic attraction to someone else. Even with this connection, it can be hard to figure out what it’s like to fall in love or how it feels. Each person may define this experience a little differently.
Generally, when a person falls in love they have heightened romantic interest in someone else, and this doesn’t necessarily have to happen at first sight. Many people are friends first and find that over time their feelings change to those of a more romantic nature. They may want more from a relationship than just friendship and may harbor more than friendly feelings for the person they are in love with.
The word fallen suggests that there is a certain helplessness in these feelings of attraction, and they are not necessarily under the control of the person suddenly smitten with great affection. It is true that people cannot always determine who or what attracts them, but they need not be powerless in this regard. People can choose whether to act on romantic feelings. However, for those who are falling in love for the first time, the feelings can feel so powerful that there seems to be no choice but to act on them. Some people have difficulties stemming from this urge, which can make forging lasting romantic relationships very difficult.
It would be hard to argue that the initial feelings of attraction and the “in love” state are powerful. For centuries, writers and poets have sung about both the agonies and joys of discovering passionate feelings for someone else. Chaucer called this first state of “love” the “dredful joye” which represents both snares and ecstasy. Infatuation and romantic interest, especially in the beginning of a relationship, can be both painful and exciting.
People have verifiable physiological reactions when they are in this first state of love. The sight of the object of their affection can cause the pulse to race and the body to sweat. Some neurotransmitters in the brain tend to be produced in a larger volume, which can promote happiness and some anxiety. Yet most social scientists would agree that the reaction is not entirely chemical and involves the thinking brain and emotions on numerous levels.
Another point that most psychologists would agree on is that falling in love is certainly not the same thing as maintaining an extended loving relationship. It tends to be easy at first, but staying in love with one person can be difficult. The rush of feelings accompanied by the flush of first love makes it difficult to judge exactly how viable a relationship might be in the future. For this reason, it is not recommended for people to make quick decisions or lifelong commitments at this early stage. Getting to know someone after the roller coaster ride of falling in love with him or her can be a fantastic way to determine if the initial falling in love leads to lasting love.
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