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The cycle of violence is a pattern of abuse in personal relationships that goes through identifiable phases until one participant withdraws. It can be physical, sexual, or psychological and is not limited to gender roles. The cycle has its roots in a social theory attributed to Lenore Walker and is represented by an unbroken circle with arrows moving between stages. The different phases include tension building, overt abuse, a honeymoon phase, and a lull. Identifying the pattern can help victims break the cycle and seek treatment for abusers.
The cycle of violence is typically thought of as a representation and explanation of ongoing violence within a relationship. Relationships between participants go through identifiable recurring phases until at least one participant withdraws physically and emotionally from the interaction with the intention of abstaining from the interaction permanently. While this model is usually applied to abusive behavior in domestic relationships, it can be applied to any sustained personal relationship.
The abuse that occurs on a regular basis can be physical, sexual or psychological in nature and is not limited to gender roles. When people learn about abusive behaviors as children through experience or observation, the repetition of this behavior as adults towards children can be viewed as a larger and more permanent cycle of violence.
The cycle of violence has its roots in a social theory attributed to Lenore Walker, which was intended to explain patterns of abuse of women initiated by men during relationships. Walker’s evidence of this cycle relied solely on heterosexual relationships and relied on the testimony of a small number of women who were abused. The basic structure of this explanation has been adopted by many organizations working against domestic violence, where the isolation of phases of violence has been found to be true for large numbers of people in abusive relationships. While these organizations recognize that this pattern may not apply to all domestic abuse cases, the ability to identify, explain, and understand the process involved in the abuse is helpful to many victims and provides them with enough clarity to break the cycle.
An unbroken circle is typically used to represent the cycle of violence, with arrows continuously moving between stages. The different phases of the cycle are described in many different ways, but all have some characteristics in common. Some victims don’t have experiences that resonate with this pattern, but most can identify with some of the feelings mentioned in the descriptions.
During the first stage, tension builds and the victim can usually sense that violence is about to occur. The victim may attempt to pacify the aggressor to avoid reaching the next stage. This stage is usually described as a breakdown in communication and knowing that abuse is coming can cause the victim to break down before the overt abuse begins.
The second stage involves overt abuse, be it physical, sexual or psychological. If the abuse is psychological, then this phase may be difficult to distinguish from the tension phase. Physical and sexual abuse will evolve from the tension stage when the communication disruption becomes too much. This stage is sometimes called the crisis stage.
After the outburst of overt violence has passed, the third phase of the cycle of violence begins. This is the phase that does the most work to keep the cycle going. The abuser becomes affectionate, apologizes, or otherwise pacifies the victim with promises and regrets. In some serious cases, the abuser can convince the victim that no abuse has occurred. Often called the honeymoon phase, attempts to gain sympathy and keep the victim stuck in the cycle of violence must be successful for the relationship to continue.
Once the relationship has been solidified out of the honeymoon phase, the relationship enters a lull and normal activities are resumed. This period can last for some time, although it is usually longer than any other phase. The longer the lull, the more difficult it can be for a victim to recognize that they are in a cycle and that the episodes of violence are interrelated.
Showing victims a representation of the patterns of violence they are experiencing can often help identify ways in which those patterns could be changed. Sometimes, abusers who are confronted with representations of their own behaviors have the presence of mind to seek treatment, particularly if the abuse is substance-related. Even though the research strategies used to create the original Walker model were flawed by modern standards, having a tool that can be used to initiate ending cycles of violence is invaluable to any organization aiming to end interpersonal abuse.
